The Emergency Biden Replacement Tier List

Going through the Democratic bullpen in the event Biden steps aside.

Last week, Joe Biden’s 90-minute medical episode on live TV proved what the vast majority of Americans have long been saying but he and his party have refused to accept: that he is too old to campaign for the presidency, much less run the country. Despite having an overflowing quiver of potential attacks against Trump, he failed to land a single blow. Despite countless issues working in favor of his party and against his opponent, he failed to get a single point across. And, most importantly, despite a full week of debate prep and years of promises that he’s better than ever before, he looked completely lost. So, despite facing an opponent that has never once won a general election debate in his career, he got demolished, losing the prime-time event he himself set up by a two-to-one margin.

Now, after more than a year of ignoring countless warning signs and denying the existence of obvious problems, America’s liberal political class has finally woken up to reality. While they may have been willing to stick with Biden through years of rock-bottom approval ratings, gaffes, policy failures and poor polling numbers, his cataclysmic performance appears to be the final straw for many. They are no longer willing to give him or his team the benefit of the doubt about his age. From there, and in light of how fantastically well practically every Democrat besides him is polling right now, they have finally come to the conclusion that Joe Biden himself is the problem. Now, even if it is far too late, the idea that he needs to drop out of the race has finally traveled from the fringes (and the thoughts of the vast majority of the public) and into mainstream political discourse.

Will this shift actually change things? Will everyone from the New York Times editorial board to Biden’s old friends from Scranton pleading with him to drop out actually change his mind? Only one man truly knows the answer, but, either way, this article is not about that. Regardless of whether or not the leader of the free world is such a malignant narcissist that he sees the “glory” of serving until he is 86 as more important than preventing a second Trump term, it is worth taking a serious look at his roster of potential alternatives. While it may feel tempting to say that any warm body under the age of 81 would be in a better position against Trump, not all replacements are created equal. Some may, as expected, be set to crush Trump. Others may find themselves in tougher positions. A rare few may even be worse options than what we have now. Put together, how do these potential emergency nominees stack up?

F Tier

Former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton (D-NY)

She’s baaaaaack!